I don’t know about you, but I’ve had a few years when I took some time on NY Eve to dedicate a toast to the end of the year with a desire only to shake the dust off my shoes and move on! A new year is our opportunity to do just that. In addition to cleaning and clearing out 2011 records and getting ready for the tax season, I enjoy setting up and organizing for 2012. A fresh chance to do it all right this time! Maybe some of you don’t think of organizing, cleaning and clearing as fun, but no matter how you feel about it, it is a fresh start for all of us.
I took a look at our survey of topics of interest to you, the Women of Agape. I found that I had not spent enough time on women heroines from the past. Accordingly our background material contains accounts of some really remarkable women-courageous, effective, assertive, generous-you know, just like us! We will learn about Santa Lucia from Sweden. Queen Vashti is the earliest heroine of our study. She stood up to the King and the court in ancient Persia. Harriet Beecher Stowe’s book “Uncle Tom’s Cabin” changed the way our country viewed people different from ourselves. It seems an odd combination, but our next horoine is Dorothy Sayers, an author of mystery novels AND an apologist (one who defends faith). Anne Bradstreet was America’s first poet, a Puritan whose writings debunk the myths of the stogy, prudish Puritan. Fanny Crosby a blind woman, wrote more than 9,000 hymns! The account of Aimee Semple McPherson is fascinating and a wonder since her name is hardly known today. She was quite well known in the first part of the 20th century however. Dowload the pdf and see why! I’m sure we’ve all heard of Joan of Arc, but her story is worth reading…and pondering! Lastly, Phoebe Palmer, the Mother of the Holiness Movement. Like many of us, loss and hardship led to her deepening faith and led her to reach out to others. 25,000 Americans converted due to her efforts (and I’m pretty sure God had something to do with it!)
I have a plaque in my kitchen-which I brought to one Gathering. It says “Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History“. It is true that if we stay carefully and quietly in our “places” and behind the scenes, we will never make history. We must be willing to stand up for justice, peace, conciliation and respect for our vast contributions to our families, friends and our society.
Please plan to join me on January 21st at 10 AM at St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church in Oakland. As always, we will have hot coffee, tea and friendship in abundance. If you wish, bring munchies, but DO JOIN US!
God bless you,
Pam+
Agape 1-21-2012 Background Mat
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We all know it exists out there, but seldom talk about the “dark nights of our souls”. All of us are vulnerable human beings and whether we like it or not, are chemical beings as well. Our fragile inner selves suffer small slights and usually bounce back. But sometimes the ugly head of depression creeps into our lives. They say that depression is rampant at holiday times and more prevalent in women, so it seems appropriate to talk about this subject. I’m sending this a bit early so you will have time to read the articles I’ve scanned. As usual, most are from Real Simple with a couple from Oprah and Diane added. I hope they give you food for thought and may have some advice to help if you get a case of the holiday blues. Sometimes our expectations are so high that we are doomed to disappointment. I’m not sure that anyone had “Leave It to Beaver-Ozzie and Harriet” holidays (or lives for that matter!), so why do we keep comparing ourselves and our lives to television shows from fifty years ago?
Our discussion (and the articles) speak of depression-not just during the holidays. This is not PMS or “the change”, but a very real condition that can paralyze us. Read up and see what you think.
I look forward to seeing you on November 12th at St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church at 10 AM. Please come if you have any experience with this or if you want to learn how to be a better friend to someone who suffers from this malady. Chances are that you know several women who experience depression-whether you know it or not!
God bless you all,
Pam+
Agape 11-12-2011 Depression
IF YOU CANNOT ACCESS THE BACKGROUND MATERIAL, PLEASE LET ME KNOW BY THURSDAY, OCTOBER 20. IF IT DOESN’T COME UP WHEN YOU CLICK ON IT, YOU MIGHT TRY TO COPY AND PASTE THE LINK TO YOUR BROWSER.
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Yep, it’s coming. Autumn Glory is just around the corner and Halloween costumes are in WalMart. You know what that means don’t you? As soon as the Halloween costumes go, Christmas decorations will appear! So I thought we might take some time before we get too harried to think about what we’re about to do and why. In this year of financial stress, it’s even more important to put our time, talent and treasure where it will bring the most satisfying results. Below are posted some articles about practical ideas to save you time and money. But there are also some thought provoking articles about our values and how we spend our time. I hope that these articles will be of interest and help us all to take time to savor a bit.
Of course, I hope you will be able to join us on Saturday, October 1st at the usual time (10 AM) and the usual place (St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church in Oakland) for what I have come to expect, a lively discussion amongst the remarkable women of Garrett County!
God bless,
Pam+
Agape 10-1-11 Revised
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We don’t seem to hear much good news these days. Our media is full of details about just HOW BAD things are. I don’t know about you, but there are times when all of this pessimism gets me down. I have a sister who copes by (apparently) ignoring it all. I don’t know if she reads, listens to the radio or watches television, but she is as happy as a clam-full of love for everyone and everything. But I don’t believe that escapism or ignorance is the answer. I spoke in a recent sermon of our conundrum of having no choice but to wait for God-wait for God’s will to be done on earth and eventually-wait for God to take each one of us home.
In the meantime, I need to hear some good news-right now. Do you feel the same? I will post some articles (from Real Simple Magazine, Diane, and Oprah) about women and men who have perspectives that may help us realize that good news IS still there-for us and our loved ones. But I would like each of you to come to our next Gathering or post in the “Comments” section of the blog site some good news. This can be something encouraging within your family or set of friends or from a media website or ?
Our world is filled with bad and good-as it always has been. For the entire history of mankind on earth, there have been wars and conflict of many kinds. Every generation has sought better things for their children and in many cases, lived to see their dreams realized. But every generation has felt some pain and I guess that is a good sign…for at least we care not only for ourselves, but for those who come after us. We’ve dealt with life’s tragedies and triumphs in our Gatherings. This Gathering will be a celebration of the beauty present in our world. Please join us for an uplifting of our hearts and minds.
Until then, may God bless you all,
Pam+
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When we hear stories of successful women throughout the ages, we sometimes feel that their accomplishments are somehow out of our reach. We suspect they posses(ed) some extra gift of courage or luck or gumption. Today we will look at some heroines-both from the past and the present. As you will see, they have affected our world greatly. I have a plaque on my kitchen wall that says “Well behaved women seldom make history”. And it’s true that if we remain “nice girls, quiet, obedient and subservient”, we will most likely, leave this world with no marks. Last gathering, we talked about our role as mentors. As we interact with our daughters or daughters-in-law, our sons and our grandchildren, we have opportunities to affect not only now, but the future. Our generation of women have made amazing strides, but there still is a long way to go. The women we will discover in our background material did not settle for the status quo. When they encountered injustice, they spoke up! The more contemporary women offer advice “recipes for success”. See if you agree…
Our next Agape Gathering is Saturday, July 23rd at St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church in Oakland. Please join us if you can. Bring a friend or neighbor is you wish. They are welcome as well. Oh-one more thing. I thought that we’d take a look at our church bulletins and see how much we have in common (or not!) in our services. So-please bring a bulletin from your church so we can compare and learn!
7-23-2011 Agape Success Stories
God bless each of you and our beautiful summer,
Pam+
*note: Our background material came from Real Simple Magazine
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“God saw everything everything that he had made, and indeed, it was very good.” Gen 1:31. Some experts claim that most of our problems (of mankind in general) are that of a lack of self-esteem. “They” state that the quest for power and greed is really a quest to feel better about ourselves. Women, with society telling us that our appearance is all important, are particularly sensitive to issues about our looks. As we age, society is particularly hard on us as images of the young and beautiful are thrown in our faces. It seems as though we just get to the point of knowing who we are and what we want and then we start falling apart!
This Gathering, we will discuss how we see ourselves, our bodies and our feelings about aging. This year and last, we have focused on life passages. Saturday, May 28th we will talk about the fact that God did create us and stated that we were “good”. When we depreciate ourselves, are we not accepting God’s view of us, his creation? Look over the background material and see if it resonates with you. Most of the material comes from Real Simple Magazine, one of my favorites! I look forward to seeing you and apologize for the Memorial Day weekend scheduling. I would have changed it, but this year am resisting the temptation.
God bless you all,
Pam+
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what it would be like to have a spouse become ill or die from an illness. What are the realities of the situation from the inside looking out? But are our imaginations correct? We have all had friends and relatives lose someone dear. How do we best respond? What things are truly helpful? Do we show up with meals? Offer meals? How can we avoid saying something hurtful? Where is the line between allowing privacy or intruding? What are the unexpected results when troubles hit? What are the blessings?
To learn from those who have or are facing these issues, we have a panel of women who have first hand experience. Thanks to their generosity of spirit, they will share their lives with us when we gather on this coming Saturday, April 9th at 10 AM at St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church in Oakland. For this gathering, there is no homework! Do give these issues some thought however and come prepared with questions for these gifted women. Carole Perez, our own Ellen Fritz and Sue Kellam have graciously agreed to give us an insider’s view into this life passage that many of us will face. Come and see. Bring your friends so we as women, can look down this road and be better prepared and more knowledgable. We can be better prepared and informed as well in the delicate dance of being a true friend to a dear one when troubles strike.
I look forward to seeing you as spring teases us! If you cannot join us, please accept my wishes for you to have a beautiful and blessed Easter.
God bless,
Pam+
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I am very happy with the development of this group. I am continually struck by how very much we have in common, but also how much we have to learn about and from each other. Last month and over the last few Gatherings, we have discussed some meaty issues of life-marriage, death, elder care and forgiveness to name a few. At our last Gathering, our discussion was so interesting (presented by Nancy Elizabeth Nimmick) that we didn’t even get to part of our topic area-that of caring for our spouses (or them caring for us!) during serious illness. We talked about carrying the discussion over to this Gathering. I then had a brilliant idea! Wouldn’t it be most interesting and enlightening to hear from women who have or are dealing with this issue? So for our April Gathering (April 9th), we will have a panel of fascinating women to share their experiences with us. Don’t miss it!
For this month’s Gathering, we will discuss something with which we are all very familiar-advice! Whether giving giving or receiving it, we as women feel compelled to try to help when we see someone we care about in pain or heading in the wrong direction. And our Womanly Wisdom comes into play most acutely with members of our own family-our mothers, daughters, grand-daughters and our adopted family-close friends. (And no, sons and grandsons are not exempt!) The attached file is large, but really quick reading and entertaining. What would you add to the list? Do you agree with the shared wisdom? Disagree? However you feel, our discussion should be easy-going. So, join us as we take a look at the Wisdom of Women and along the way, talk about mothers and daughters. So don’t be intimidated by the size of this file, just go and do something else while it downloads!
I look forward to seeing you and catching up. It seems like a long time since our last Gathering! We’ll have the coffee on and be waiting for you!
God bless,
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and we all have (or have had) parents. These relationships are complex. Most of us will deal with caring for our parents at some time in our lives. Or we may be faced with caring for our spouses or children who need our help. How do we handle the changes? How do we face the challenges? What ARE exactly the challenges we will face? What resources are available to us on our mountain-top community? How do we honor them and protect ourselves and our families from losing OUR lives? How do we set boundaries? How do we handle the emotional stress?
Our own Nancy Elizabeth Nimmich, Licensed Clinical Social Worker, will briefly address our gathering this Saturday, January 8th at 10 AM at St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church in Oakland. She, who works with Hospice of Garrett County, will give us information about Hospice and how it works. She will lead us in discussion of care and address some of the questions raised in the preceeding paragraph.
In addition, I will direct you to several websites with articles on the topic. Strangely, in all of the articles I’ve saved for use with our Agape, none were particularly pertinent. It is a difficult topic and one we most often just HOPE won’t happen. We know that the time may well come, but put off thinking about it-until we are forced to jump in and help. Gerontologists have expertise, but we procrastinate. Then we ineptly try to “help” and find that we lack the knowledge to be most effective and kind to those we love. So here we are. Check out a few of the articles and resources. Bring your questions and your experience to share. Together we can learn and help each other face the inevitable-with grace.
http://seniorhealth.about.com/library/eldercare/bl_apact.htm
http://www.usatoday.com/money/perfi/eldercare/2007-06-24-elder-care-cover_N.htm
http://www.bringingeldercarehome.com/childcare_and_eldercare.html
http://eldercareabcblog.com/how-to-deal-with-aging-parents/
http://www.washington.edu/admin/hr/benefits/worklife/resourcecent/eldercare_library_122305.pdf (this is just for references for further study)
http://www.newjerseynewsroom.com/healthquest/the-sandwich-generation-the-modern-dilemma-of-elder-care
http://www.revolutionhealth.com/healthy-living/caring/caregiver/family-friends/caring-spouse
http://www.wellspouse.org/ (a source for information/resourses)
http://news.all4naturalhealth.com/longevity-boosted-when-caring-for-sick-spouse/
That’s about as much as you can probably absorb-for now. There are resources all over the “net”. The purpose is to open our minds to the topic and get us prepared.
God bless,
Pam+
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and a new year filled with delights. I’m watching snowflakes gently fall-remembering that they are each unique-miraculous. It is a wonder that with the g-zillion people who inhabit the earth, we are each unique as well…and that is miraculous too! It is our unique-ness that makes our discussions lively-for we can experience similar things, but we all have a different perspective. We learn from each other and grow-in wisdom and grace along the way.
I hope that Agape, A Gathering of Women is and has been interesting and worth your time this year. I hope (and pray) that the opportunity to meet women from different faiths and different churches has enriched your life. I hope (and pray) to bring you interesting topics and speakers that will lead you to set aside some time to refresh your souls.
Our first Agape gathering is January 8th-so put it on your calendars! I don’t yet know the topic, but I will e-mail you when I do! In the meantime, there is a website which may be of interest to you-www.prayables.com. It is a site dedicated to women-reaching out to other women for prayer and communication. Go to the site for better and more complete information. It was brought to my attention by a new (and lovely) “member” of Agape, Mary Boscaino.
I know this is a busy season-so this message will be brief. Please accept my thanks for being part of this Gathering. I pray that this year will bring you contentment, joy, love and whatever your hearts’ desire!
God bless you all,
Pam+
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